mayiLDo you know how people say “fake it until you make it” when you start something new? That “new thing” could be a career, business, or even a hobby.
Even some of the books I read on productivity said that you can change your habits, actions, and behavior when you fake it till you make it- fake your confidence until you become more confident, act like the person you aspire to be until you become that person. The problem with that for me was that I could not pretend to be something I am not! It never felt authentic to me even though I understood the concept and psychology behind this often-quoted expression.
My focus always ended on the negative side, like “this feels fake”, or “I am not being myself, this is inauthentic”. This in turn only slowed down my progress.
That was a bit of terrible advice, in my opinion. Try this instead; change the word FAKE to EXPERIMENT. This small mindset shift was life-changing for me.
Thomas H Edison.
“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work!”
Often when we are confronted with situations where we feel unqualified, unconfident, or are afraid of judgment or failure, we try to find a way out and fake it. In some situations, it might work. However, it can backfire in the long run.
But, if you are anything like me and just hearing the word FAKE makes you cringe, switch it to EXPERIMENT. When you run an experiment and it fails, what do you do? You assess the situation and run the experiment again. If it fails again, you find out what the problem is, make slight changes, and give it another try.
As you continue to experiment, you will start seeing patterns of what does and does not work for you and your business. You will gain more confidence, take more action, and move the needle towards your goals.
3 ways to Experiment till you make it:
1. Invest in yourself.
And I don’t mean to go obtain a business degree if what you have is a real estate license. By investing in yourself, I mean adding to the knowledge you already possess and looking for opportunities that promote growth.
When I graduated with a degree in web development in 2003, my friend and I decided to open a small design firm. It was a male-dominated industry back then. As women, we spent so much time trying to prove ourselves that we never invested in learning new skills to run our business.
On top of that, my partner and I didn’t have a clear vision, nor did we have goals for where we were heading. To be honest, I believe we both had different ideas about what roles we wanted to play in the business. We were so busy doing other stuff that we never took the time to talk about what the goal was. If we would’ve communicated our objectives, we could have guided our company to become successful. Not sharing our expertise grew frustration and didn’t allow room for growth. Another problem was that back then, everything was a secret. This is why we didn’t know how to approach other business owners to learn about their habits and processes to see what did and didn’t work for them. Applying the advice of other entrepreneurs to our business could have saved many errors and a lot of time. Wealth is not only financial. It’s also mental – invest in yourself and in your future. Take the time to learn from others; don’t try to reinvent the wheel! After two years, we decided to close our doors.
Joel A. Barker
“Vision without action is merely a dream, Action without vision just passes the time. Vision with Action can change the world!”
Something that is often overlooked is the importance of understanding ourselves. We lack self-knowledge, which requires an ongoing process of self-awareness and self-consciousness. I want you to take inventory and ask yourself a question: “What have I been investing in?”
When you invest in yourself, you have a better sense of where you want to take your projects. It will help you make more promising decisions based on what you like and dislike.
2. Take action and move towards your goals.
Never be embarrassed about starting small- everyone has to start somewhere! Don’t compare yourself with the person you aspire to be if you’re starting fresh. As one of my favorite authors, Brendon Burchard says “all ‘Experts’ are students first”. Make clear goals and move towards them. A year from now, you can be helping the person who’s where you are currently.
I’m a self-taught photographer. In the beginning, because I lacked the knowledge and didn’t feel confident enough to charge people, I was doing a lot of shoots for free or with little money. After a while, when the little voices in my head would say “You don’t belong here” or “You’re not a real photographer, you went to school for web design, not photography”, I chose to shut them up and start taking action. I was only projecting what I thought other people would think of me if they found out I didn’t go to school for a degree in photography. In reality, my clients didn’t care. Other photographers may have, but I wasn’t interested in trying to change their perceptions of me. I was trying to improve myself. I wasn’t faking it, I was doing the work. I wasn’t where I wanted to be yet, but I was working towards that identity. I was experimenting.
When I discovered my mentor and business coach, I decided to invest in her education program; I doubled down on mastering my craft, the art of selling, and getting out of my own way. I fell in love with my products/services and learned to value my time and my industry. If other people’s perceptions of you are what’s holding you back in your business, continue experimenting, making clear goals, taking action, and doing the work.
3. Keep growing.
Maintain a growth mindset. I always tell myself this: Life is a never-ending school, you will keep learning until you take your last breath.
Many people that have been a guest on my podcast have told me “OMG I was so intimidated and nervous to be your guest!” and I would think “Reeaallyy? Me?! Hmmm, interesting…”
If you feel intimidated by other people, remember this; they might be good at something you’re not good at, but they lack in other areas. And, just like you and me, they too have fears, weaknesses, and strengths.
If you want to be more self-confident, grow your business, be more sociable, spring into action. Stop hesitating and comparing yourself! Go to that networking event, practice your pitch, and start experimenting over and over until it becomes second nature.
Take action in order to improve your results and please don’t become a know-it-all… Keep learning and growing! Stay curious and have a beginner’s mindset.
Do not fake it till you make it! Instead, keep experimenting till you make it! Be unapologetically YOU.
Cheers to your success!
If you run the experiment, let me know how it goes DM me here or join our networking group here. I would LOVE to hear from you!